Week 5: Post Trial

[disclosures]

[It's post trial and she's... not really feeling anything. Emotions feel more distant, but that was the point. All it means is the medicine she requested is working. Though it's only one of the pills.

But she can be found in the kitchen counter, staring blankly ahead. She only looks up when she notices Sanji's walked in.]

I did say I wanted to talk. When I said I was a Historian... there were five of us. So I've lied to you at least once.

Are you sure you want to trust me?

Comments

[disclosures]

[Well that's one weight off her shoulder. The other is what he said during trial. Is it fair to tell somebody else about those feelings? Probably not? But she's always been the impulsive type.

She moved across the country for a guy she ran into.]

I don't... care about myself. Not really. Not much. So when you said nobody wanted to die, you were wrong. [Because she's wanted to. It's a feeling that comes and goes, but the longer she's in this castle the more she just doesn't want to play.]

I was lying for the other Historians.

But I do care about you. So before my near inevitable death, if you don't cast a vote, you'll die. It's not a pretty way to go either. We've been getting memories of the last run of this "game".

I figured I should at least tell you.

[concasse]

[... Oh.

Dropping his eyes for a moment. That's a heavy truth to hear, and Sanji folds his arms, trying to think of... anything to say to that]

Thank you for the heads up.

[...]

But why do you think your death is inevitable? Because you wouldn't fight back?

[disclosures]

I wouldn't fight back if somebody tried to kill me. I don't know... how the Blotters choose their victims of the week. But there aren't that many adults left. It seems like the teenager are mostly okay.

[She holds her left arm in her right, squeezing it, trying to stay grounded.]

But if you ever need a hero to die, I'm one of them. I'm the Little Mermaid.

[concasse]

... But.

[But he doesn't want her to die]

Oi, even if that's true, don't count yourself out like this...

[disclosures]

I don't really think... I deserve to be here. I barely care about any of these people. The number of people I care about? They only fit on one hand.

[There's three people she cares about in this entire castle. How fucked is that, when she's trying to make people tell her useful information, trying to get them to do their objectives or at the very least tell them to her.]

And I act like I care because I have to. As a Historian I have to get people to do their objectives. They won't do that if they don't feel like they can trust me. I've been here, this entire time, trying to gain people's trust.

But it's not like I really trust them back.

I haven't even told Cardia I'm a Historian.

[concasse]

... Even if you don't trust most people, you've still been put in an unfair position here. Being a Historian comes with shitty risks, I'm guessing.

[Leaning against the counter, this time with his hands in his pockets.]

And not trusting people isn't a sin, Rebecca-chan. Or not caring about everyone.

[Heh, probably harsh of him, but...]

We've all known each other, what? Six weeks? That's not a lot of time.

[disclosures]

I don't know, we've been keeping it secret, more or less. I don't even know what the other Historians have been doing or who knew about them.

I see everybody getting so worked up during trial and I... don't. I don't care. Because you, Natsuo and Cardia are alive. I don't like seeing people dying every week or getting executed.

[If he thinks that's harsh then-]

A kid confessed he deserved to die in place of other people and I... didn't care about it. All It made me think of was myself. [You're selfish and weird. You don't care about anybody but yourself. She can't deny it.]

I wish none of this happened, and I've apparently been through it twice. I don't even remember what happened the last time. I just get bits and pieces. every week.

[concasse]

[A soft noise, but it's one of sympathy instead of judgment. He's keeping fast to his belief that Rebecca is not inherently bad person because she looks out for herself.]

Maybe all of that is true, but... even still.

[He's not going to judge her harshly]

I know Cardia-chan would think to the same, too.

[...]

And you're getting memories of another game on top of this one? Shit. That's just poor luck.

[disclosures]

It is all true. [She shakes her head.] Cardia should have a better partner. She deserves one. Somebody who's actually good at looking out for her.

The last round. That's why we know not casting a vote ends in your death. The last game didn't end properly because Tiger was killed. Belle, whoever she was, thought it would end it for good but she was wrong.

[concasse]

To be honest, it's hard to look out for anyone in a place like this.

[He's just sayin]

... So that shit was true.

[What he'd read in the letter. Jeez.]

Tch, annoying as it is, that's good to know. I'm surprised no one's tried to kill the Crafters yet.

[disclosures]

I barely feel like I'm even trying. She's a lot stronger than I am. [Emotionally and physically.]

That's why they have the Historians here. To give information so this round doesn't end like that last. I think that's why that leather bound book in the library keeps updating.

[concasse]

... Makes sense.

They can't afford another fuck up, I'm betting.

[Which is all well and good, but Sanji is still Displeased by the idea of Rebecca dying, and feels his jaw work as he searches for... something to say.]

If you can't believe in yourself, then at least believe in what Cardia-chan and I are seeing in you. We're not asking you be perfect, or even like us. Being yourself is enough...

[disclosures]

This is also the last time they're going to do the game. That's the other reason they want it to go smoothly.

I like both of you. Do you really think I'd offer to heal you if I didn't? [But she shakes her head.] The best I can offer is I won't ask anybody to kill me.

Do you... have any questions? I don't know if I can get everything out of the Crafters, but I'll see them again on Monday.

[concasse]

... The last one, huh?

[Huffing a sigh. Sanji is stubborn as all shit so even if he lets the topic go, it doesn't mean it's gone forever. Just for... today.]

Not off the top of my head, no.

I mean, knowing how to end this shit without almost all of us being dead first would help, but I doubt that's gonna be an option for us.

[disclosures]

[They're both incredibly stubborn people. Rebecca's heart is set on this, even if she can't really control whatever the Blotters are going to do.]

As long as I'm alive, you can always ask me to talk to Tiger and Dragon.

[She doesn't expect to be alive that long though.]

[concasse]

... I appreciate it.

[...]

If you don't mind me asking, what happens on the Mondays you meet with them? Do they check how many objectives you were able to convince others to do?

[disclosures]

We get memories of the last game back. Little pieces. It's not always something useful. They do check that. Depending on how many people we've helped complete their objectives, we get to ask more useful questions.

... Do you know anybody else's objectives? Anyone who might need help with them?

I know you don't want to do yours.

[concasse]

[Never has Sanji been so conflicted about his own shitty objective, even knowing the stakes.]

The people I've asked have been pretty damn quiet on it. Except Natsuo.

He tried to bury my knife in the hopes it'd turn into a coin.

[Sigh.]