Week 5: Friday

[disclosures]

[It's post investigation and the two bodies have been uncovered. She can't really say she was close to either of them. But there were definitely people who were.

For now, she's going through the castle, trying to find Sanji wherever he might be.

It's always hard, trying to find the right words for this. There aren't words that can ease this kind of pain, and even if there were she's sure she wouldn't be able to find them.

But maybe there's something she can do.]

Comments

[concasse]

[Sanji grieves in quiet. That's just... how he's always been. So it's by design that Rebecca has a hard time tracking him down. He doesn't want to be found.

But eventually, if she checks outside near the wishing well (thankfully it's stopped raining), she'll find the chef nearby, hands in pockets.

Just... staring down into it.

He doesn't realize she's there.]

[disclosures]

[There's a great thing about Rebecca that she simply hasn't been forced into using while she's in this castle. Which is to say, she's one of the most stubborn people in the world. If she wants to find somebody she is going to find them.

After what's happened, she can understand why Sanji wanted to be alone.

Does she say she's there? Or does she just help from the shadows? What's ruder?

It takes her a moment before deciding. In the end, she walks up.]

Sanji?

[concasse]

[his head turns, quickly, and there's a moment of shock at her approach.

It quickly morphs into an apologetic smile]

Ah, Rebecca-chan!

Sorry, you startled me...

[disclosures]

You don't have to force yourself to smile for me. It's... been a hard day.

[She tucks her hair behind her ear and looks up at him.]

There's not a lot I can do for you. But... there's something. Please, let me do this for you, okay? There's so much terrible going on so... let me try to make it less awful. Just a little.

[Her voice goes very soft and afraid. Putting herself out here like this is terrifying.

Somebody's already rejected her help before. It's either her help or all of her that gets rejected. Thrown out like she didn't matter at all.]

... Don't reject me...

[concasse]

[He has... no idea what she's talking about, and all he can recall is the last time they have a very serious conversation where the idea of rejection came up.

...]

I won't.

[He'll... wait, to see what she means]

[disclosures]

[While she brightens, there's an edge of sadness to her smile.]

I can heal all your injuries. The price isn't even that bad.

You'll just... You'll forget who healed you, that's all. [There's the particular thing that hurts.]

It'll be worth it. Because I like you.

[concasse]

[Hearing all of that just seems to make Sanji sad now -- that first part especially, and his eyebrows knit in disapproval.]

I have to forget?

[That's... ironic for many reasons that he won't tell her. This poor lady doesn't need any more stressful stories on her soul]

But I should at least be able to thank you for this...

[disclosures]

I didn't make up the rules for the gifts. I wouldn't have chosen it to work like this.

[Listen she doesn't like the idea of making people forget that she's helped them.]

I could tell you later, but I... don't know if you'd believe it. It's not really something that... suits me.

[concasse]

[... Oh Rebecca]

Of course it does.

Cardia-chan and I were even saying a couple weeks ago that you really need to give yourself more credit.

[...]

So please tell me, if you could.

I'll believe you.

[disclosures]

[Oh.

Oh, they really believe in her?

Her eyes start to water, but she tries to blink away those tears. It's only because they don't know about all the awful things she's done. They don't know how many times she's lied to herself, to the people in her life, the way she destroys her relationships in a desperate bid to keep them intact.

She shouldn't believe it too much.]

No, I don't think I should give myself any credit at all.

[She pulls him into a hug, pressing her face into his shoulder before pulling away.]

I love you.

[She sings softly, out of tune as Sanji's injuries heal over.]

1/2

[concasse]

[He opens his mouth to protest -- of course he does, Sanji will fight on her on this, perhaps the only area he'll give her any type of dissent -- but there's tears in her eyes, and that's enough to stop him with a concerned look aimed at her.

Followed quickly by a hug he doesn't get much chance to return.]

Rebecca-chan...

[He's sorry that he can't return those feelings. No, he's just a dead man walking, with no future, whose just... tired, and more problems than he could ever tell her.]

[concasse]

[And then with his injuries healed, Sanji stands in place as a blanket of confusion settles over him]

... Mmm.

[Rubbing the nape of his neck]

I'm sorry, I...

[Glancing around]

Were we discussing something...?

[disclosures]

[She knows this is the way her gift works, but it hurts. It hurts so much to think that whenever she helps with will get forgotten.]

N... No, we weren't. [Liar, a vicious voice in her head screams. But it's better to lie and pull away than to be rejected again. She's already gone through it with every man in her life.

This is better. She can't be hurt as much if she tries to keep her heart locked away. Something safer than opening it up for it to get tossed aside.]

I just healed you. That's all.

[concasse]

-- Eh?

[Holy shit, she is not wrong. Sanji startles after looking himself over, and -- there's not a scratch on him. His body doesn't hurt.

He is so confused]

-- Of course I'm grateful, Rebecca-chan!

[But why doesn't he remember this happening?

Jeez, this Friday has got him all twisted up.

... Well, nothing to do but smile about it, looking to her in thanks.]

Is that your ability? What a fitting one~!

[disclosures]

[She offers him a shaky little smile.]

I'm just happy you're okay.

[Because she definitely has feelings for him. She confessed them. Then she just immediately erased it right out of his memory.

She's just a coward, in the end.]

You think so? I don't think it fits me very well.

[concasse]

Oi now. Call it a bias, but you've always been kind to me.

[Never changing his opinion. Ever.

And the confusion settles a bit now that he's healed and Rebecca doesn't seem the worse for wear.]

... C'mon, it's not raining anymore, but let's get back to the castle. I can make up something warm to drink.

[disclosures]

That's because you started by being kind to me. I like you.

[Rebecca's only human. Affection and attention are things to be treasured.]

Come on, let's get hot chocolate or something.